Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Be Back Soon

I know I have been MIA, ever since I got home from Florida, school has taken over. I have about 3 weeks to go then I am off to Florida to visit the Keeper again. YAY!! I have taken the summer off from school so I will be able to finally catch up. I am finally going to be done with classes and into externs this fall, the down side to this is a JOB comes next. I have become used to not working, it will be a change.

This was sent to me by the Rock in my e-mail, thought it was good.



THE RULES OF RURAL INDIANA ARE AS FOLLOWS:
Listen up City Slickers !



1. Pull up your droopy pants. You look like an idiot.


2. Turn your cap right, your head isn't crooked.


3. Let's get this straight;

it's called a "dirt road." I drive a pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you=2 0drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.


4. They're called cattle. They're live steaks. That's why they smell funny to you. But they smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? Rt. 70 goes east & west, I-65 goes north & ; south. Pick one.


5. So you have a $60,000 car? We're impressed. We have $150,000 corn pickers and hay balers that are driven only 3 weeks a year.


6. So every person in rural Indiana waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.


7. If that cell phone rings while an 8-point buck and 3 does are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.


8. Yeah, we eat 'tater
s & gravy, beans & cornbread. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.

9. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.


10. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.


11. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.


12. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup. Oh, yeah.... We don't care what you folks in Cincinnati call that stuff you eat... IT AIN'T REAL CHILI!!


13. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet and served over ice.


14. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.


15. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a site more fun to watch.


16. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -- it
spooks the fish.

17. Colleges? We have them all over. We have State Universities , Community Colleges, and Vo-techs. They come outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at everybody when they come home for the holidays.


18. We have a whole ton of folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines . So don't mess with us. If you do, you'll get whipped by the best.


19. Turn down that blasted car stereo! That thumpity-thump crap ain't music, anyway. We don't want to hear it any more'n we want to see your boxers. Refer back to #1.


20. 4 inches isn't a blizzard - it's a flurry. Drive in it like you got some sense, and DON'T take all our bread, milk, and bleach from the grocery stores. This ain't Alaska . Worst case you may have to live a whole day without croissants. The pickups with snow blades will have you out the next day.


Excited to catch up with everyone soon.

5 comments:

The Incredible Woody said...

Same rules apply for rural Tennessee. Except for #20 - 4 inches = natural disaster 'round here!

My Metabolic Rate is Stuck said...

LOL! Now I don't have to read the same email Rock sent me! Thanks!

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

Love this! See ya soon!

Snooty Primadona said...

Glad to see you coming up for air!

That list probably fits Texas as well. Amen.

Caution Flag said...

Sounds like Kentucky, too, and I miss it. Miss you, too!